It takes a village. That is for certain. As the wise Prince has shared, “Dearly beloved…we are gathered here today to get through this thing called life.” Together. None of us will actually make it out of here alive – so let’s make this life a better “thing” and a better place to be, to live, to love.
As many of our readers know, my nephew, Carter Boerboom, passed away on June 30, 2015. We usually dedicate an annual blog in his honor and memory. This one comes a little earlier than usual because we need your help. Yes – you… your help. We are hoping to win a little friendly competition hosted by the Minnesota Timberwolves. They are going to remodel a court in southern MN, and Marshall has been selected to be one of the possible sites. We are asking you to please vote daily to help us bring “Carter’s Court” to Marshall. This is possible with the help of those who proposed the idea and have worked to make the dream almost real. Voting ends on Friday, May 24th– so don’t delay. With your help and votes, this dream can become a reality.
Carter loved life, and he loved basketball. Help us pass this love for life and love for the game to many more to come in Marshall, Minnesota and surrounding communities.
Mother’s day is a wonderful day to acknowledge those who have and continue to love us unconditionally and miss those who are no longer with us. Thanks to my own Mom 🙂 I spent this past Mother’s Day watching my three sons play basketball and football. It did not involve a relaxing brunch on the patio with a mimosa. It involved snacks in a cooler bag while traveling from gym to gym and back again and then to the field. It involved a Mother’s Day card, gift, and single flower from my boys – and not to forget the pens and “No” button from the girls (my nieces who know me so well). The day most importantly involved hugs and kisses from the kiddos. It was wonderful overall!
At one the gyms, I witnessed something that reminded me of some of the things that I have learned and continue to try to learn along the way. It caused me to reflect… Why do we do this? All of this? Why double or triple book? Why do you drive your kids all over for activities? We should be cleaning the house or could be relaxing with a book. So I may not have all the answers to the questions… I have slowly found some, and I thought I would take a few moments to write down the answers for you – the younger version of me.
Listen to the voices. You will hear them say, “Are you crazy…driving your kids for hours to practice?” “Do you really think they will go pro?” Answer those voices loudly and clearly. “YES!” I am listening to the voices now… the right ones… the ones coming from the backseat for those long drives while doing homework. They mean the most to me, and I miss them already because although the days sometimes seem long, the years are flying by. “YES!” My kids will go pro. The reason you chauffer your sons everyone both near and far for practices and competitions IS to make them the BEST! It is the type of best that you need to learn more about. It is not to be the best athlete in the competition. It is to be the best version of themselves in life. They will be professionals in life – no matter how their paths wind. They are learning communication skills, versatility, adversity, advocacy, prioritizing, and you bet, budgeting. The crazy ride cannot happen without it. There are growing pains involved with it all. Even when they mess up and aren’t perfect, help them grow and love ‘em up. Just keep stretching and listening.
Be quiet. As we have become seasoned parents of young athletes, we have grown a considerable amount as supporters from the stands. Don’t be mistaken… grown does not equal perfect. Everyone stumbles. We learn through failure and perspective. We have slowly been learning perspective. Even if the team or school does not, implement the 24-hour policy for contacting coaches and teachers. If it is a safety concern, that is something different entirely… and you will know the difference. If not, write it down. Don’t yell at the refs or your player on the court… you like to focus on “boxing out” but by the time you yell it, it’s too late. Still working on this one…it is a favorite one of mine at any age. “Box out” is in the running for most widely used shout out, but now behind phrases like, “Nice job, buddy” or “Keep your head up.” In this judgmental world, there are plenty of nay-sayers out there so no need to add to that mix for your own kids.
Judge less. Just a reminder that you are not perfect… Did I say that once before? Even when you are older and wiser, you are not perfect. That’s okay. No one is… even if they think they may be. Judge less and love more. Everyone has something in life that they are dealing with, working on, living with… cut them some slack and hope that the love is returned.
Be naïve. Be realistic. This does not have to be hypocritical. Think they can along with them, but know that can means and looks differently for each person. Help them pursue their dreams with their eyes wide open. Perspective continues to be your word this year. 🙂
Just be. Be who you are and the parent that you can be at the time. It’s okay to strive for perfection but expect less and just be okay with it. Your house is not spotless – so what and who cares. If they care, then they don’t care about you. Oh – do continue to just try to get your kids to make their beds, however. Just let your kids know that you love them no matter how many minutes they play or what activities they want to discontinue because they no longer love them. Politics are everywhere so just love them and let them know it is okay to just be… just be kind, just be honest, just be respectful, just be.
There is so much more advice that I want to give you, but I recall all too well how I did not always like being told what to do a younger age… sometimes I still don’t at an older age. 😉
Again, no one is perfect so cut yourself some slack. Like the fact that you wanted this blog published three days ago – so what? The world is still turning, and your older self is continuing to learn to prioritize with perspective. Just because you wrote this and are reading this doesn’t mean that you will get it right each time all the time. We have grown as parents with our own sons as individuals, learners of the game of life; we have learned that there is so much more to the game than the ball on the court… the character on and around the court is what truly counts.
Enough already…you need to get going…you need to pick up your kids from school and get them to their activities tonight. Oh- but one last one because even your older self continues to try to squeeze in one more thing… life is short and no one knows when the clock runs out… so hug more and keep on huggin’!
Our life is what our thoughts make it. ~Marcus Aurelius
Imagine a light switch for a moment. Flip it up – and voila … let there be light! Flip it down – and poof … the light is gone in a blink of an eye. If the light switch is on, it really makes it easy to find what you are looking for. If the light switch is off, it really makes it hard to find what you are looking for. (And no – you can’t use the flashlight on your phone to help you.) In Dr. Caroline Leaf’s 2013 book, Switch on Your Brain: The Key to Peak Happiness, Thinking, and Health, readers learn about the power of a light switch and how it compares similarly to switching on one’s brain. Amazing to consider!
I recently went on an adventure that allowed my brain some time to think and to be creative. I found myself reading Leaf’s book… and then taking notes. It took quite some time to read because I kept getting distracted by taking notes in attempt to memorize Leaf’s points. In fact, I couldn’t get the book finished in time for this blog, but I just couldn’t wait to share it with you … Read on to see some thought-provoking quotes from Dr. Caroline Leaf’s book sprinkled in with some of my own two cents. Enjoy!
“What would you do if you found a switch that could turn on your brain and enable you to be happier, healthier in your mind and body, more prosperous, and more intelligent?” (Leaf, 2013, p.13).
Um – YES! Sign me up! Dr. Leaf tells us how – and it’s simple too. Your mind is the switch. Page one of the prologue gives away the secret – and makes me want to read more. I have always heard and preached about the power of positive thinking… and now I know that I am positively right about being positive.
“The choices we make with our mind impact generations” (p.14).
“If you realized how powerful your thoughts are, you would never think a negative thought. ~Peace Pilgrim” (p.15).
Leaf pairs scripture & science throughout her book with amazing clarity and connections. Her words direct us to common language in our lives… We believe in God the Father…
Believe in yourself…
I think I can, I think I can…
“How we react to the events and circumstances of life can have an enormous impact on our mental and even physical health” (p.20).
“You can do whatever you set your mind to…” (p.20).
A recent example of this was when I was visiting my Grandmother. She has not been doing so well and has needed help getting out of her chair… except when she “gets something in her head” and “makes up her mind to do something” as Grandpa kindly puts it. Notice in the video that she has dancing on her mind. 🙂
“Mind over matter” (p.25).
“Happiness comes from within and success follows – not the other way around” (p.26).
A somewhat controversial yet powerful statement – “You don’t have to fear that if a condition runs in your family that you are going to get it (for example, Alzheimer’s, Parkinson’s, or depression)” (p.26).
“Matter does not control us; we control matter through our thinking and choosing. We cannot control the events and circumstances of life but we can control our reactions” (p.32).
“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things” (Leaf 2013, p.62 and the Good Book – aka Bible – Philippians 4:8).
Consider “5-16 minutes a day of focused, meditative capturing of thoughts” (p.75).
“We cannot control the events and circumstances of life, but we can control our reactions to those events and circumstances” (p.82). Amen.
“…state of mind in which we switch off to the external and switch on to the internal… in this deeply intellectual state… is more focused and introspective… we move into a highly intelligent, self-reflective, directed state” (p.82).
“In this directed rest state, you focus inward, you introspective, and you appear to slow down; but actually, your mental resources speed up and your thinking moves to a higher level” (p.83). Wonderful rationale for siestas and vacations!
In closing, the light switch is yours to decide what to do with … flip it on or off. If I can give any advice, think positively and let your light shine. It makes the world a much brighter place for us all.
Amazing how quickly time flies by… just wow! This was a year ago already – my experience serving as a teacher for English learners. Today, I was privileged to be part of the Reading in the Content Areas classes, and share about culturally responsive teaching with the K-12 and secondary teacher candidates and about my sabbatical experience. Joining me today were two EL experts from our community with years of experience working with English learners and integrating Culturally Responsive Teaching (CRT) into their teaching. Culturally Relevant Pedagogy is another term for Culturally Responsive Teaching. CRP can be defined as… “A pedagogy that crosses disciplines and cultures to engage learners while respecting their cultural integrity. It accommodates the dynamic mix of race, ethnicity, class, gender, region, religion, and family that contributes to every student’s cultural identity. The foundation for this approach lies in theories of intrinsic motivation” (Wlodkowski & Ginsberg, 1995, para 2).
Today was a wonderful opportunity to engage in dialog around CRT with our future teachers, who – no pressure – are responsible for changing the world one learner at a time. Best of luck to all – and enjoy! Life is short – so share it with others.
Wlodkowski, R.J., & Ginsberg, M.B. (1995). A framework for culturally responsive teaching. Educational Leadership, 53(1), 17-21.
You may have heard the phrase… “Everything I need to know I learned in kindergarten.” It was true… until my sabbatical. What is a sabbatical you may be asking? It is a time to reflect, a time to renew, a time to reenergize, and a time to start fresh… Some spend time during sabbatical researching, writing books, focusing on different work, and/or relaxing on location. It provides an opportunity to try something new and to stretch professionally in ways that have been imagined during stressful days…or unimagined. My imagination originally directed me toward writing a book and relaxing. At least that was what I imagined when my sabbatical seemed far off. As my sabbatical began approaching my imagination had a new image in mind, which would require an intense amount of time, energy, and emotion. You see my sabbatical experience took on a life of its own in a PK-2…
As we think about the holidays and the recent celebration of Thanksgiving, we give thanks. We give thanks for so very much… and even more than we really thought about before… We are thankful for the relationships that we have with the people we hold dear. We are thankful for family and friends – new and old – and those yet to be made. We give thanks.
They say a picture is worth a thousand words. Here are just a few of my thousand words possible as I remember and give thanks…
Thankful. Home. Son. Prayers. …Rewind several days – Basketball. Fastbreak. Dunking? Maybe, Maybe Not. Bleacher Steps. Base of Head or Neck. Frozen. Shock. Caring Coaches and Volunteers. Ambulance. Scared. Prayers. Emergency Room. Disbelief. Possible Paralysis. Helpful and Kind Medical Team. Prayers. CT scan. Helicopter. Prayers. Hurry. Pack. Family. Prayers. Drive. MRI. Involuntary Movements. Prayers. Wait. Swelling. Spinal Concussion. Spinal Contusion. Prayers. Wait. Texts. Calls. Questions. Concerns. Community. Prayers. Voluntary Movements. Prayers. Family. Smiles. Relief. Future Surgery. Anxious. Prayers. Wait. Smiles. Family. Amazing. … Thankful.
This wild roller coaster ride reminds us to give thanks for family, friends, and community. Without each other what a lonely world this would be. Thank you.
Hurry Up! We need to be on time. The game is about to start! What game you may be asking? The waiting game that is. You know… the one in life that we all play together. We are on the same team – us v. time. We get going to where we need to be… and wait to leave, and wait to arrive, and wait to start the game, the appointment, the … (you can fill in the blank) – life.
Here are some very common examples of waiting:
Waiting for a high school summer league basketball game to start…
Waiting at the mall…
Wait dancing is a common practice is it not? 🙂
Dr. Wendy waiting for her PT appointment and waiting to feel better while her grandson is waiting for her…
Fathers and sons bonding while waiting for doc appointments…
Kids waiting for an oil change…
Brother waiting for his bro at the dentist…
Traffic waiting…
Check-in waiting…
Ferris wheel waiting…
Are we thereyet waiting…
We wait on average an hour a day for the next thing in life to happen. That doesn’t seem like a big deal until we do the math… something like 5 to 6 years of our lives – waiting.
Waiting can be challenging and try our patience – especially when we are in a hurry to get on with what is next in life. In our world of instant gratification, waiting can upset us and drive us to become mad – out of our ordinarily calm demeanor. Who you and me? Maybe. What’s important to remember is that good things come to those who wait. Right? Don’t be miserable while waiting for life. A good attitude and perspective can make all the difference. Enjoy the wait. What are you waiting for?
It is this date again – June 30th. I remember walking with Stella in the early morning sunshine last summer remembering a year before that – in the hospital watching my nephew die. We prayed for a miracle so that he could stay. We prayed for a miracle so that he would peacefully let go. It was a struggle that we all shared. It is a struggle that we continue to share. Today’s blog is in memory of Carter Joseph Boerboom; it is written by his father, Wade Boerboom, for families who are fighting cancer and praying for their own miracles.
Anyone who knew Carter knew how much he liked his gift of gab. We can’t imagine where he got that from… Have you met his parents and extended family? 😉 These are the real words and raw emotions from his dad in a letter to his son, putting into print the many chats they frequently have.
Hey Carter,
So get this, Aunt Sonya asked me to guest blog for her website. Yeah I know, homework in the middle of summer, right? But she asked that I use it as writing a letter to you. I guess she didn’t realize I talk to you every day. Oh well, I guess to humor her I will pretend I don’t and write this out to you.
So, what else has been happening you ask? Well, I suppose we should catch up on everyone.
Freaking Lebron & the Cavs won the NBA title in 16, but the Warriors got them back in 17! Kevin Durant ended up going to the Warriors this last summer in free agency. I think just to stick it to Lebron. They went 16-1 in the playoffs. Only lost one game to the Cavs. I wanted the sweep, but losing just 1 isn’t too bad either.
Oh, I feel bad about this one. When we were told your cancer was back, on June 10th, 2015; you said “does this mean we can go to Duke?” You were too ill to travel, so Joy and I decided to check it out this fall. What a cool place! They beat up on Grand Canyon. The kids/crowd were going nuts the whole time. You would have loved it.
Katie is on her 3rd college & 3rd car. Yes, she really is. She attended Morris for her freshman year. She did ok, but I think she spent more time in Alexandria with Tom than she did in school. She wanted to try St. Cloud fall of sophomore year. She lived in Tom (Geske) and your mom’s house in St. Cloud. There was a crazy stabbing in the mall where she worked. Thank goodness she wasn’t there. I’m thinking that was the turning point, and they both just didn’t really love St. Cloud anymore. She came home to SMSU, and is a 3.9 now. Yes, she really is! She just rented a little house in Marshall. She’s growing up, I guess. Tom is working at Action Track Chairs. As for the cars… The Dodge basically just died. Then last week we had hail & it took out the Focus we replaced it with. Damn kids and their cars…..
Belle went to Mankato last year. She lived with her cousin Alex and a few other girls. Interesting year. They had a gathering that got busted before school started & then got robbed over Christmas break. She is doing well in school. She job shadowed a chiropractor and a dermatologist this summer. Let’s hope she really makes money after graduation, lord knows she likes to spend it.
Sam graduated this year. Get this, he has a girlfriend! Yes, our Sam. She came to the house the other night for venison/b-day picnic. Our tradition of having those for you kids continues. We had yours this year too. Sam is planning on going to SDSU this fall. I can’t wait. Division 1 hoops! They actually made the big dance this year. Sam and his buddies have a company now – Average Angling. They upload videos, and get paid for it. I think they have made something like 17cents off their fishing videos now.
Maddie is driving now. Katie and your mom go to lunch with her from time to time. She looks like she is doing well & having fun in school. We see on Facebook that she does lots of sports & time with friends.
Sam and your buddies all miss you too. I think they are still up to the same shenanigans – maybe not shooting hoops off the top of the golf cart anymore though. Sounds like Sam is going to St. John’s University for school next year. Of course we figured he would. His family brought you to a couple of Johnny’s games. I think they are pretty big fans of SJU.
Joy is training and coaching full time now. She left Schwan’s to start a gym at the office. She started with personal training and expanded to Rock Steady Boxing. It’s boxing exercises to help Parkinson’s patients with their symptoms. Her clients seem to really like her, even though she yells at them & beats them up. The Rock Steady Boxing thing was something we saw on 60 Minutes. The best part was that her training was in Indianapolis. Joy worked, and I got to go to the Big 10 Tournament.
Kailen & PJ are workout bffs now. Both are getting pretty fit too. I think they work out twice a day. Sounds like Kailen will be the running back in Cottonwood this fall. Should be fun to watch.
Lori, Tori, and Tiffy moved to Bloomington. Lori is a VP or something I guess. Big time, right? Tori is driving and will get her license soon. Tiffy is in basketball, softball and volleyball. All this summer. They are pretty busy. I think the Beer-Straights think they live there, too. They are up there usually three weekends a month. They usually bring the dog too.
Jack is going to camp after camp for football. Sounds like he is headed to Ohio for one in July. He just got his moped license. Crashed the other day. Just a little skinned up. Not bad enough to come see you. Jonah and JR both played SW Slam this spring. We caught a few of their games. JR seems to favor the 3 pointer. He is not as proficient as you, but he is still young.
Bill and Missy are doing well. Still camping & riding motorcycles. They went to Arizona and rode to Vegas last spring. No pictures of ass-less chaps have shown up, so we are all good. They chase Wyatt around a lot. He is pretty good at hockey now & made a couple traveling teams. One tourney was up in Duluth. He lifts weights now at the high school. I think he is finally starting to grow. Cody is buying Lori’s old house, and has a roommate-Dylan. Let’s hope they don’t kill each other.
Braden bought a house in Cottonwood and got engaged to Amy. 20 years old, going on 30. He is farming with Ron and building a hog barn. I bet Ron never thought in his wildest dreams that he would have hogs on that farm again.
Tam is not an empty nester yet. She still gets one more year of chasing Kailen around to games. They like to fight a little, but I think they are both going to miss each other.
Grandma Glenda sold the store. Yep, the days of free ice cream are long gone. She travels a lot. She likes the bus trips they do around the different parts of the country. She lets the kids drive her corvette for prom. Sam went and then kept the car for about two months now. Nice grandma, huh?
Grandpa Ron and Lois like to camp & travel. They went to Hawaii last year. He still farms with Braden. I think he plans to delegate more of the work soon. He is just waiting for Braden to get the barn done. He wanted to see his “home” farm last year in Belgium, but there was a bomb at the airport so we all chickened out. Looks like we are finally going to get there this fall.
Grandma Nancy wants to retire, but Grandpa Steve doesn’t want her to yet. Maybe another year. She has shorter hours in the summer so she can spend more time in the garden and tinkering around the farm. Grandpa still drives all the time. He still loves to catch the grandkids’ games and tries to get to as many as possible. He of course runs a little hot when things don’t go quite right, but he is getting a little more mellow. Maybe that is where Bill gets it????
Grandma Betty and Grandpa Joe have an apartment at Boulder Estates now. They still visit the farm and like to have coffee there. They are as funny as ever. They celebrated their 70th wedding anniversary in May. They are looking forward to seeing you again one day, too.
Your mom & Tom are also doing well. They like to get to the cabin as much as they can. I’m glad you got there a few times before you had to go. They named it Carter’s Cabin. Lynd just got hammered with hail, so we won’t have to worry about siding contractors for quite some time. Tom will stay busy! Your mom started teaching – subbed at Holy this past year. I think she really enjoyed that. That gets me thinking of all the homework we tried to make you do your last year. It’s like you knew you really didn’t need to spend a lot of time with that.
The Pats and Ore & Jenny are doing well. Morgan is getting married and has a baby. So I guess that makes you a second cousin? Or a first cousin once removed? I don’t know. They are well and miss you.
So now that you are all caught up on everyone, what’s been going on with me. Get this, in the fall of 2015 I was told I have Melanoma In-Situ. So cancer, but just on the surface of the skin. 99.5% curable. Nothing like what you went through, but still cancer. AGAIN, the same year????
The Agency is doing well. I just keep plugging away. After 30 years of eating and drinking, we finally have KB’s as a customer! Persistence pays off. You know, you were supposed to come work with me and take over one day. I still have the letter in my office from when you were in 1st grade. It said you want to sell insurance and take pictures of houses. That’s not all it takes, but you had about 90% of it down.
We are repeat “Over 30” city league champs! I know, my 3 point per game average is not the difference anymore. It has a lot (everything!) to do with Shuan Wisdom. I like to golf as much as I can. Somedays it goes well, some days it doesn’t. I like to get up early and play. Gives me time for our “talks” early in the morning.
One thing I have been thinking about as your anniversary comes around is that I don’t think I took the time to realize everyone lost you. I was pretty wrapped up in feeling sick/sad/pissed/poor me, that I sometimes forgot that everyone else lost you too. The thing that really struck me was even though I was shook up, you took it pretty well, and it was happening to you. That really helps me believe we will have this talk in person again one day.
Friday is two years since you moved away. I gotta tell you, it was rough at first.
A couple things I will never forget about that day. You were all sweaty, so we decided to change your clothes. We kicked everyone out of the room except Tom, nurse Dan and myself. We figured we would put you in Duke apparel. If you are going to go, go in style right? Anyway, as we are changing you (yes, shorts and all) your eyes popped open and you threw a punch right at nurse Dan’s face. I guess waking up with ½ your clothes on caught you off guard. He didn’t get hurt too bad… you were high on morphine after all.
The last two things you said in your first life will remain with me forever. First, you said “I was chosen, I am going to die”. What an incredibly profound statement to hear. Even more so from a 14 year old. Always wise beyond your years. I couldn’t believe it. Was it faith? Was it God talking to you? Was it to comfort all of us? I think it was a little of all those. I also believe it was your way of telling us that you were going to be okay. For you to know it and accept and acknowledge the situation was incredible.
You said something about “My babies! Where are my babies?!” We all leaned in close & asked “What babies, Carter?” You said, “I have two babies.” “The dogs?” your mom asked. “No, I have two babies.” I like to believe in some life you do. One bit of advice for you. If your kids want to shoot hoops in the driveway when it is late and cold out, do it anyway. In April of 2015 when you were feeling good, you wanted to shoot hoops. After a while I went in the house. I sat for about five minutes and then said to Joy, “I think I have to go shoot hoops in the cold with the kid some more.” I thank God all the time that I went back out there with you. Even though it was colder than shit out.
Today is the day. Not yesterday and not tomorrow. Today is the LAST day of school for this academic year for my three sons. What happened? Where did the time go? The year just flew by! They grew in many ways over this past year as we all have. I almost blinked and missed it. Ms. Stella grew up, too! She turns 2 years old today.
Stella, the family St. Bernard dog
So as the school year ends… It is that time of year where we hear and give life speeches at graduation commencements and receptions about this is not just an ending but a beginning; a new chapter as we look to the future. Words of advice are shared and some may be remembered. My nephew, Samuel Dieken, is graduating from high school and will be headed to college in the fall. I remember when he was just a little guy. Where did that time go? He was just starting school – both shy and ready to take on the world, right? He is again.
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Dr. Wendy knows this feeling all too well with the preschool graduation of her grandson. Where did that time go? He was just born; he was just learning to walk and talk. Well, he is all “grown up” and ready to take on kindergarten. He is about to walk his own path.
It isn’t just the school year that has flown by. Everywhere I look I see life’s milestones marking time. We recently celebrated my grandparents’ 70th wedding anniversary.
L. Joe & Betty Ann Claeys along with their children and families threw a party to celebrate this milestone. Amazing the legacy they have created with their bond of love that started so many years ago!
Cheers to a life of love and longevity. May we all know that. May we not blink and miss it. A thought for this time as we wonder where the time has gone? Don’t blink… Remember the last moment as it has helped shape who you are today. Enjoy this moment and then the next moment. Don’t blink.
This summer and for the rest of your days – enjoy the little moments, enjoy the big moments; remember the past, dream of tomorrow, and live life today.
Remember that film – Field of Dreams? “If you build it, they will come.” I loved that movie when I was younger. My optimistic, idealistic self still believes it to be true. “Go the distance.” I think it can happen. I ask why not? Even after days that I feel beaten down with negative situations, negative responses, and negative people, I get up the next day, and am ready to change the world. One would think I would eventually learn my lesson, right? I do love to learn, but maybe I don’t want to learn that lesson – to believe the negative and be a pessimistic person. I’m not alone, am I? Most certainly not… it takes all kinds of people to make the world go round, and it takes surrounding ourselves with people who help make our mindsets positive to keep moving forward. We need each other to motivate and be motivated. We are a team! Lately, I’ve been thinking about a motivational speaker who I heard speak earlier this semester. With the world spinning faster than usual lately – or so it seems, I am feeling the need for some positive motivation to help build that field of dreams and to continue to go the distance.
With motiviation on our minds, I have a question to pose to you… Will you work harder for something required or inspired?
This simple question caused me to ponder momentarily. I knew the answer without a doubt, but also knew all too often how “being required” is a way of life for many. Perhaps it is the only way for some things, which we will not debate today, but it tends to provide a veil for a lack of trust and should we dare – deceit. For example – you are required to take/pass this standardized test because you are not competent without it. Okay – maybe that is not a perfect analogy, but I have standardized testing on the brain. How about this one? You are required to complete 125 hours of continuing education because you won’t want to grow as a teacher without being required to do so. Before I continue on my soap box, let’s get back to the simple question to start. Will you work harder for something required or inspired? This phrase was shared by Rob Bell at a conference session entitled, “Teamwork Makes Dreams Work.”
This upbeat and motivational presentation made my nerdy notetaking self jot down some highlights to share with all of you as well as some of my reflections.
So what’s really important in the work place or school environment – or anywhere really?
Appreciation.
Feeling of being “in on” things – inclusivity breeds buy-in.
Sympathetic help with person problems – life is not always about work.
Provide constructive yet kind feedback – SIP – Specific. Immediate. Personal. Warm fuzzies are wonderful, but they need to be paired with comments for growth. Even perfect can be better.
The way to motivate is to validate. And be authentic when validating and in all of life really. Who is better at being you than you? Consider the important characteristics identified in being authentic and real with colleagues and friends in aims to lift each other up:
– Sense of Humor -Reliable -Optimistic -Timely -Thoughtful -Honest –Happy –ABCD: above the call of duty -Empathy
Remember the power of conditioning and that actions speak louder than words. We are what we think and what we say. I’m alive. I’m awake. I feel great! We have to start with ourselves and then reach out to others. You know the phrase – “I don’t care what you say I care what you do.” It tells a story as does body language. If your words are not consistent with the language you choose, people will believe was they see. How do we grow in our language? Consider keeping a gratitude notebook and listening – silent listening…be in the moment. Refrain from the word “but” when responding. Let’s Plan a vacation. Yes but… yes but…But shuts down opportunity. Another phrase often used is “It’s against our policy.” Instead try this: “Let me tell you what I can do.”
More than not – use this simple phrase: “Thank you.” It will amazingingly change your world and mine.
In closing –
Enjoy the moment.
Change is uncomfortable. It is inevitable. Growth is optional.
What is a wow today is standard next year. Keep growing.
Plant seeds not weeds. Apple seeds…or your favorite seeds…make your world great.
It’s a lot more fun to be excellent than mediocre.
Let’s make them say wow!
Build that field of dreams! Go the distance and make us go with you!
You can’t always be certain. Sometimes what it appears to be just isn’t so. Sometimes it is something entirely different. Sometimes it is what it is. Most times this is the truth.
It either is or isn’t – a cat. Right?
Recently, Minnesota author/illustrator Mike Wohnoutka addressed the Southwest Minnesota Reading Council hosted on the Martin Luther College campus in New Ulm, Minnesota. I was privileged to attend with a former student-teacher gone teacher and two teacher candidates. It was an evening filled with learning, laughter, reading, reflecting, doodling, and discussion. What does a cat got to do with it, you ask? Let me tell you….
Growing up with three older brothers, Mike Wohnoutka loved to draw, and he was determined to do well. From early on he would go to his room to read to get away from a little of the noise. He displayed talent early on, and his Headstart teacher noticed right away. She wrote a note on his report card indicating that he was an artist and that he should continue to draw. Later on in life his high school teacher suggested that he go to the library to learn about and study others’ works. He then went on to enter a contest in high school with a portrait of his dad, which drew him on the path to an art school in Savannah, Georgia with a 4-year scholarship.
Fast forward to today, and you will find that Mike had multiple opportunities to try out his talents – sometimes noticed and sometimes unnoticed. His talent is obvious and telling. He drew a cartoon masterpiece within seconds right before our eyes. It was incredible.
Throughout his time as a write and illustrator, Wohnoutka has had opportunities to work with a plethora of talented folks. He shared about his life as an author/illustrator and how each day starts with sitting in his study and thinking. It usually involves some coffee; sometimes there is music, sometimes there isn’t. “Think about who. Think about what.” That is telling lesson right there, and one we agree with as a principle. Dr. Wendy & I tell our teacher candidates that we teach learners, not subjects. We teach who, not what. When writing This is Not a Cat, Wohnoutka started with character development. That makes sense and is where we all should start – with the who, with us.
He talked about one particular work that we loved to hear about, to read about, and now to share with our students. This is Not a Cat. It reminded us that what we see is not always what we should believe. It also made me think about not being too overly confident with a decision; there is room for error in that suit. The mice in this picture book are pretty scared when they see a cat, which turns out to be a rat in a cat suit. Later, a real cat hunts that rat. This made me think of the phrase “what goes around, comes around.” Karma.
So many lessons in that simple but awesome book. Maybe I am grasping at straws but so be it. I saw the talent first hand. I am no literary award granter, but I like a book that can hook a reader and share a lesson or two. If it can cause a little suspense and some laughter, even better.
Southwest MN Reading Council Executive Board Members with Author/Illustrator Mike Wohnoutka
In closing… recently our SMSU colleague family has experienced deaths that have caused us to reflect on what is important. What is important to you? Find out and stay the course… Life is too important and too short not to know. Know what is a cat and what is not.
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