Holiday Sorrow

My jovial, handsome brother would be celebrating his 66th birthday today. Makes me wonder what he would look like at 66? Probably just as handsome as he was 42 years ago before he entered his heavenly home exactly two weeks prior to his 24th birthday. We lost him right before the holiday season began.

Losing a loved one is hard, really hard! Add losing that loved one around the holidays and it seems to magnify the sorrow. As sad as it was for me to lose my only sibling, I saw the devastation and turmoil it caused my mom and dad. Especially my mom. I’d say it took her at least five years before I saw a small glimpse of the mom she used to be. I had missed her so much, so I welcomed this tiny step toward her healing with such hope and gratitude to God.  

My hubby and I have been watching “The Crown” on Netflix and we just watched Episode 2 of Season 5 the other night. One scene shares Prince Philip soothing his grieving cousin after she lost a daughter to cancer. This cousin is wanting to start a charity for cancer victims, and the Prince shares these wise words about grief with her:

“A long time ago, I lost my favorite sister, Cecilia, in an airplane crash. I learned then what grief was. True grief. How it moves through the body. How it inhabits it. How it becomes part of your skin. Your cells. And, it makes a home there. A permanent home. But, you learn to live with it. And you will be happy again. Though, never in the same way as before. That’s the point. To keep finding new ways.

Prince Philip lovingly encourages her to keep finding new ways to embrace joy and happiness through the grieving process.

There have been so many losses recently and it is HEARTBREAKING!! I want to hug every single person who has lost one they love. I want to gently tell them “you will be happy again.” But I don’t. Everyone’s grief is their own. Everyone deals with loss in different ways. Those of us on the outside looking in…please be empathetic to this. Let them (us) journey through their grief in their own way. No matter how long that takes. Just be there for them. Somehow. Someway.

Whether it was just yesterday, last year, or 42 years ago, to all of us experiencing tragedy and loss, I offer these scripture hugs and love and heartfelt prayers…”

💔 I mourn with you. Romans 12:15B, “…mourn with those who mourn.”

💔 I weep with you. John 11:35, “Jesus wept.”

💔 I offer compassion and love to you. Lamentations 3:32, “…he will show compassion; so great is his unfailing love.”

💔 I pray for your broken heart to heal. Psalm 147:3, “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”

💔 I pray for God’s comfort to embrace you. Matthew 5:4, “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.”

💔 I pray for you to find rest in the middle of your sorrow. Matthew 11:28, “Come to Me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”

💔 I pray you know God cares for you and will lift you up. 1 Peter 5:6-7, “…so that at the proper time, he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.”  

And…

💔 I pray you find inner peace. Numbers 6:24-26, “The LORD bless you and keep you; the LORD make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you; the LORD lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace.”

Finding joy and happiness once again will come. It may never be the same, but it will come. It may take quite a while, but it WILL come. Believe it. Receive it.

Sweet Jesus, I lift up all who are going through or remembering a loss this close to the holiday season, and I pray you would be very close to each one who is in mourning today. You are the God of all comfort who comforts us in time of need, and I pray for those who are facing such a painful trial today. Uphold and draw near to all during this season of grief. Sooth away our heartache. In Jesus name, Amen.

Sending my deepest sympathies, hugs, and prayers to all of us experiencing new and old loss! And…happy heavenly birthday, big brother. Love and miss you.

Find Peace in the holiday sorrow! 🙏
Profs Dr. Wendy Dr. V. 

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